Life / Aug. 14, 2019
When Taiwanese pianist Huang Hsin-I and his fiancé Ramy Inocencio were discussing the arrangements for their wedding in Taiwan, Hsin-I warned Ramy that the beginning of August (their chosen date) was peak typhoon season.
They also discussed how the country was ov0I(pTWVFk8l$-l)(VaxF3!lA5K#PKmqV(=-RvGO&Lz=G(81T94erdue a large earthquake and whether they would be tempting fate by marrying during Ghost Month—a big no no in Taiwanese culture.
But, Hsin-I and his award-winning journalist fiancé were determinetm_-ZEFq(hM$odg*Zq-EKB2Pgqo3+4ABMWb@r0zZWpt=iI7T_xd to wed in Taipei.
They wanted to celebrate Taiwan*E0ea@+Z&22sTGgxUNyr(@ZNNBL))2JcLBo_t)mFj9wJ#G&i@9’s landmark move to recognize same-sex marriage earlier this year.
And, it was important for them to show soliqN&C8PuU39NcZ$yks*LQ*rc9xuC-OCmD2WJG0u#)uwr05)BhV8darity with the Taiwanese people making waves for LGBTI rights in Asia.
But, their determination was rocked (literally) when one of the largest earthquakes to hit Taiwan in recent years woke them up at five in the morning just two days before their wedding ceremony was due to take place.
Things became more complicated when they discovered Typhoon Lekima was also barrelinsfJUT)KF6ltb)rbnaDuTqqAQ$Jeh_(BZ9b*koE7wA1Pqwr=@^)g towards the country.
More than 100 guests were scheduled to eK-jNq1-bt6#f87&p8-A7*iJjeJNZq6UjWxje@XV^gLDhIYYWrattend the wedding banquet at Taipei 101’s Ding Xian on the Saturday.
Force 9 winds alDwwTn@VhFLkoI=O#I0&u(yzv0%DzUkw!e$D3FNxajD0py*g9SEso scuppered Ramy and Hsin-I’s meticulously planned day trip to Jiu Fen and the north coast for some of the more than 60 friends and family who had travelled to Taiwan from Singapore, the Philippines and New York to attend their wedding.
"There was a lot more stress and tension than we were expecting,” said Ramy. Btv8baN$@!URssk3F5F#Mqj@_Tuep8p3IXjpTAQ_(tC5zV1h3I7ut, he said “a series of natural disasters befitting a screenplay couldn’t stop us”.
Hsin I, Ramy and their parents (Photo: Tyler Lyons)
"We just rolled with it"
Hsin-I, who's father is from Taoyuan, met Ramy on Tinder in New Yog6fn$$!IHN^J0Ld=1MgO*iYbpiHubk-dWQI(U5=S$6=Yf&MxtYrk in 2015.
A couple of years later, they had been talkinam+#yujfFWhvStMcfrdS4JErvydyHd63kOkvFsWkn96JMEjW15g about their future together and the possibilities of starting a family. On a visit to Paris, Ramy popped the question.
In his vows on the wedding day, Ramy described Hsin-I as the "anchor to my kite”. He explained how Hsin-I grounded him and supported him. “That was how we got through all the disaster52tW0uw#MHxZUEwTouD$ypG8Z(GLuI(XS#b+x^#4bTj1-Hulxms”, he said.
So, when the pair received panicked calls from Ding Xian on the night before the wedding explaining that Taipei 101 would be closed the following day due to the typhoon, Hsin-I diligently spoke to the venue, photographers, singers, and qcFCFdy8QdpApBI@12xAeZ8&_Lb&A0eg3uGz-7fi#s--(=79nwguests to rearrange the wedding for a day later.
Ramy did hisxZwBf3&@)1(o0NP=Z2QP$a=MHi8JFA^sdE%_kOALP#HaEN=^n5 part by keeping their guests entertained. “We didn’t fight, we just rolled with it” Ramy said of the last-minute change of plans.
The pair had already had a nightmare day. They hastily rearranged a mountain and &!2!D)pUvYX1ygK6hs0Bh$CjI7A8jD)649n$4w*xIsvumpvOPOseaside day trip due to the bad weather. Luckily Hsin-I and his family pulled some strings to host their guests at a Hakka restaurant in Taoyuan, a nod to his family’s heritage.
Hsin-I did consider hot springs as an alternative wet-weather activity. Bu_6TvfFAKQGVw%oIdR-eE$r@uEvXGDz)MYr!t(qQrv#A_kB^wf1t, the pair thought all the guests seeing each other naked prior to the wedding might be a little “too close for comfort”.
Ramy and Hisn-I said their visiting friends and family were super supportive of the last minute changes. They sent smiling selfies to them tEh^&8YcgoTH0H)-A8JTMamazMq=u8ll+Y%6p7ZadO-r71ezcYPhroughout the tumult. Virtually all of the guests were able to attend the rearranged ceremony.
Ramy and Hsin-I kiss outside Taipei 101 (Photo: Tyler Lyons)
The ceremony
As both of the grooms come from Asian families (Ramy’s parents are from the Philippines and Singapore) Ramy and Hsin-I wanted to show respect to their parents during the ceremony.
On the big day, the grooms’ respCN!vReo)rw3c#h)H2$e)Z%tHYPnnFeDCGsZ%T#4BlFaS4a+Zveective parents walked their sons halfway down the aisle. The pair then walked the remaining way together.
There was also a mother’s dance to give them their time in the limelight. Ramy explained that having a same-sex wedding was liberating, as there was no rule book to follow on how the ceremony shoul(VDi1q&DgcL2TgwGYPviZ4oQFSABEm%0WHT1x-n-(#LwPPuzdGd be.
The pair opted for traditional Taiwanese banquet-style seating. But, the celebrations started S0AHI*vxT#m+&TNqcu1HihYKGT49rhx29nRbP&DlI7T-wjLqQ-with cocktails. “Alcohol was very important for our guests” Ramy explained.
Hsin-I said his mother decided it was not a traditional Taiwanese weddincBr+F2swkuyCAZ++y9dhNiTp1lM38gJ06%lgC=_d&D28C0j6IGg.
The ceremony was also a celebration of acceptance. Ramy was not sure whether to invite conservative family members from the Philippines and Singapore. But, he decided that if he didn't, he may regret it later. They all c45RS75qk9)yX-QuD#MR6W#*YyJ+7Kwn-lZBg$nC*1v%APtaO(9ame.
Hsin-I’s mother told Ramy to no longer call her "Huang mama" but simply “Mama". Hsin-I’s godmother, who when they first met referred to Ramy as “that person”,AK%v2JzjjU2)=SFbtv6ccuIz^SQKjEHRWe*k8mCJlSrqa7R#16 now calls him “My Ramy”.
Ramy’s uncle from the Philippines, meanwhile, made a point of personally welcoming Hsin-I to%(iI^IMABC#aSQJI3%n&^99mxSMrBnYH0rs19m1u2VyAFf#7Eu the family.
Hsin-I and Ramy kiss in front of a cake featuring their dog, Cooper. (Photo: Tyler Lyons)
"Brought joy to my heart"
Rg7llJm=&h5Ekkn%OEult!n!G4yP_zsJ69qT$n9j!A51IhdT$c9amy and Hsin-I’s wedding was revolutionary in many ways. It was the first same-sex wedding at Ding Xian—prompting some of the staff to join in the celebrations by taking photos.
It also garnered a message of support from President Tsai Ing-wen, who said the marriage “brought joy to m!HH9ui#j0)IOIG!$n_tDe-=2@7TD+aLBk5nbVyr^DOfp0KyGRby heart”.
"I wish the both of you can respect, love, forgive, help each other and be uniteIH4TazHz(FK=HN6n_iMdoNPyk+nP*dWZeMFnG_(RE!pc!YUBp0d by love forever” she wrote in a letter to the pair.
But more importantly, for Ramy, Hsin-I and their guesNHmlCt0Vxb2ZRvQDp)6rw$eS8SZw$VX5EzIVmJM5yBSbA)f9gyts, it was a celebration of love.
"For people who aren’t exposed to the LGBT community don’t always know hotSy+%cQbM1bt6OJW7i=(S1sPE84y815(h9Wz3fS$NWP*KZF%)Yw much love there can be until they see it” Ramy explained.
“But, when people realize there is so gwq4k7BG$Xl&535ZmO43NScTaqgL)0mz_9hvPUYtf&bzVR7LH4much love in the room, it doesn’t matter if you're gay or straight”.
