Life / Aug. 14, 2019
When Taiwanese pianist Huang Hsin-I and his fiancé Ramy Inocencio were discussing the arrangements for their wedding in Taiwan, Hsin-I warned Ramy that the beginning of August (their chosen date) was peak typhoon season.
They al!v6cJ)J-bp8$+e1T_SDf6-&S(5Hi$#lzW=j3waq7q2aeW1!e^6so discussed how the country was overdue a large earthquake and whether they would be tempting fate by marrying during Ghost Month—a big no no in Taiwanese culture.
But, Hsin-I and his award-winning journalist fiancé weqHO0y!V1gKxr-gCVGKrfwfkJ=1Zd!l#A3B6@8rraXukp0JmsFOre determined to wed in Taipei.
They waCc%$(efjfB2L5jJZkb!vZog1UsCabZd5EjG__HZbVqWDPd^@c%nted to celebrate Taiwan’s landmark move to recognize same-sex marriage earlier this year.
And, it was important for them to show solidarity with the Taiwanese people maiU51y6(DsPIr@TUQWI&dmE%7%UL^vtV6Z3ZZwhS^9m@vMQtHJQking waves for LGBTI rights in Asia.
But, their determination was rocked (literally) when one of the largest earthquakes to hit Taiwan in recent years woke them up at five in the morning just two days before their wedding ceremony was due to take place.
ThingsKOv%542L18QymmZ5dm3S!AO-Xy7fmjJl8%VLZQMkNKJ!F7vO0i became more complicated when they discovered Typhoon Lekima was also barreling towards the country.
More than 100 guests wermuPVNZeg4A-^(S_A*GM1y^CjSaW8TmJZICFaiC6*Q-R@rN5B9ue scheduled to attend the wedding banquet at Taipei 101’s Ding Xian on the Saturday.
Force 9 winds also scuppered Ramy and Hsin-I’s meticulously planned day trip to Jiu Fen and the north coast for some of the more than 60 friends and family who had travelled to Taiwan from Singapore, the Philippines and New York toN_YlmzQ)dixt)B(Ha!s)bxWnF*=RNKQi5EANgT@i1x8cNQTdWG attend their wedding.
"There was a lot more stress and tension than we were expecting,” said Ramy. But, he said “a series of natural disasters befitting a screenplG@Vs=oq4IpzC4N1mWx=vPcdyz%C)zOWAFT_BDW9Q=%gQH_DBICay couldn’t stop us”.
Hsin I, Ramy and their parents (Photo: Tyler Lyons)
"We just rolled with it"
Hsin-I, who's father is from Taoyuan, met Ramy on Tinder in N2cP%Q(Vn!y9aSvke1f*p+-Zmxw*c6=T0e)h!&OlrcmBCUr#MFEew York in 2015.
A couple of years later, they had been talking about their future together and the possibilities of starting a family. On#ZuycY5)+jU@Fg*GY4c=^H+ZeWKlX&SSkfkcb(CNTlc(g89z&C a visit to Paris, Ramy popped the question.
In his vows on the wedding day, Ramy d5GNVodMkylaQEaxJ-Gg%6-9C@-5gJx96_7lH@COcDHlaWSFHrwescribed Hsin-I as the "anchor to my kite”. He explained how Hsin-I grounded him and supported him. “That was how we got through all the disasters”, he said.
So, when the pair received panicked calls from Ding Xian on the night before the wedding explaining that Taipei 101 would be closed the folr8_X+EBuNrIvBLhW#i$p9B6Ex)fOMt%tRF*wi+gbjc(dOfidc)lowing day due to the typhoon, Hsin-I diligently spoke to the venue, photographers, singers, and guests to rearrange the wedding for a day later.
Ramy did his part O#mRjV4A@S$DUPhFE(orfPjRW^m$*@hB)Ev_f%4^6GcbMy2S^)by keeping their guests entertained. “We didn’t fight, we just rolled with it” Ramy said of the last-minute change of plans.
The pair had already had a nightmare day. They hastily rearranged a mountain and seaside day trip due to the bad weather.a9SWwW6*_KMjG^d)dy97Ntm$FL&&L_hYGJi)*#(R(KRgTfocNI Luckily Hsin-I and his family pulled some strings to host their guests at a Hakka restaurant in Taoyuan, a nod to his family’s heritage.
Hsin-I did consider hot springs as anSWl!Mio8^!6kk)&m@fSu^+Sgyj-4ybF*O_1r_(lnNi)*MQglig alternative wet-weather activity. But, the pair thought all the guests seeing each other naked prior to the wedding might be a little “too close for comfort”.
Ramy and Hisn-I said their visiting friends and family8oTtQ^YH!VKX7p(#8%YGC0g3JCDrsnaL0pPFeSfo2sGAxqj@%K were super supportive of the last minute changes. They sent smiling selfies to them throughout the tumult. Virtually all of the guests were able to attend the rearranged ceremony.
Ramy and Hsin-I kiss outside Taipei 101 (Photo: Tyler Lyons)
The ceremony
As both of the grooms come from Asian families (Ramy’s parents are from the Philippines and Singapore) Ramy and Hsin-I wanted to show respect to their parents during the ceremony.
On the bx$f=CB6%VeUf(A$zO2OsJ($DsnMs4%GTh_bACiF$WJp!!D20Jgig day, the grooms’ respective parents walked their sons halfway down the aisle. The pair then walked the remaining way together.
There was also a mother’s dance to give them their time in the limelight. Ramy explained that having a same-sex wedding was liberating, as there was no rule book to bZDfnMRlDRpctW5wcX*4g5yOiEWszu6f0y$$C6KH$zY+he5H95follow on how the ceremony should be.
The pair opted for traditional Taiwanese banqus7hY^KkJc*D%tqGD=Y6qf-O6+)T=l5Mn0I3091b$2dv3&w$6TFet-style seating. But, the celebrations started with cocktails. “Alcohol was very important for our guests” Ramy explained.
Hsin-I said his mother decided it was not a trfk^aY#K71Z^(ZvXpvkcG97dXRo$jSD+snNS1V)AIWy%!#P8=Saaditional Taiwanese wedding.
The ceremony was also a celebration of acceptance. Ramy was not sure whether tAzH++1!ILd_xHwpGJ-JvWqTB@p07-o&K$vDK_Dx&O8*FHAsJN6o invite conservative family members from the Philippines and Singapore. But, he decided that if he didn't, he may regret it later. They all came.
Hsin-I’s mother told Ramy to no longer call her "Huang mama" but simply “Mama". Hsin-I’s go*_l78%NeoEAP6ErLEbp=3Z7+20MfwJX1!FF1S7aWBKITp5UWvmdmother, who when they first met referred to Ramy as “that person”, now calls him “My Ramy”.
Ramy’s uncle from the Philippines, meanwhile, made a point of personally welcoming Hsin-FpjujkLK2@*ezZta-VXY@*Ko$b7*A%EW(2k2GNHFN-efC06BGtI to the family.
Hsin-I and Ramy kiss in front of a cake featuring their dog, Cooper. (Photo: Tyler Lyons)
"Brought joy to my heart"
Ramy and Hsin-I’s wedding wPGPv+dKMgpbOi5k)lxEK(9JZY8FaSJR^LGXV(&4(5AbKG+42mqas revolutionary in many ways. It was the first same-sex wedding at Ding Xian—prompting some of the staff to join in the celebrations by taking photos.
It also garnered a message of support from President Tsai Ing-wen, wVqP(i7I5CX!l(U)uY=6aW%uP_U5R@2N&tJxfjaKOmy6m$YBD*Dho said the marriage “brought joy to my heart”.
"I wish the both of you can respect, love, forgive, henoMXlKcJM1WDkTcHgk8=hAPPi@&4ej1^c@A7&*XcU((_p=B*Fllp each other and be united by love forever” she wrote in a letter to the pair.
But more importa%jytcVGrc2d4*Bg4j#e&^LuTjE*S)9j^XDFipWW!6FA@-=Wx-8ntly, for Ramy, Hsin-I and their guests, it was a celebration of love.
"For people who aren’t exposed to the LGBT community don’YVgg1HT@_23Tdie@_oPdv!&K9D@ZQ8FE(A5axb9gN#nWQG)V@Vt always know how much love there can be until they see it” Ramy explained.
“But, when people realize there is so much love in the room,+r*hR9vl6yhP(PVdm40IbYQHcIt#Q!fXhV@T1hCgu03fFJH+fl it doesn’t matter if you're gay or straight”.
