Life / Feb. 27, 2019
Sean is a single gay man from Taiwan. He went to the United States alone to go through the surrogacy process and become a parent. Although he did not have anyone to accompany him or share his life with, Sean has no regrets (nor time because parenting is a 24 hour job!) about his choices in life.
A surrogacy related conference, "Parenting Options for Asian Gay Men Conference," is coming up on March in Taipei, find out more about it!
Silently starting at my crush.
I hit puberty and started to be aware of my sexual feelings during senior year in elementary school. I discovered that it was boys, not girls, that I was attracted to. I noticed that I was different from most people but that did not cause much of a negative impact on me. This may be due to my natural personality. Although I am not an optimistic person, it seems that I have never denied or doubted myself while I was growing up. "Sexual orientation" is something that won't change even if I'm feeling negative, skeptical, struggling, or resisting about it, and my attitude towards it was just go with the flow. I remember that I was curious about “Where can I find people like me?" It wasn't until high school that I finally met another gay person. Relationship-wise, there was nothing romantic in my school days, but I was always silently staring at my crush.
Sean and his son. (Photo Credit/ Sean)
On the surrogacy journey alone.
I love kids since I was young, I've been wanting to start a family since high school. I started the surrogacy process when I was single, lacking a partner to share the joy and stress with. The surrogacy journey is really tough, and I had to bear it all by myself. When I heard the good news, I couldn't help but wish that I had a partner to be here with me. However, relationships are not a prerequisite for surrogacy. My plan was to be financially ready, after I discussed it with my family (and with my partner, if I had one), then began the process, regardless of whether I was single or not.
Sean feeds his son. (Photo Credit/ Sean)
Choose to achieve my life goals instead of giving up.
After deciding to start a family, I have devoted most of my time and energy to my son. My schedule is less flexible compared to the old days when I used to go wherever I wanted in my spare time. Now I can only go out if my family can take care of my child. There is definitely less time to go on dates, and it is not easy to have a love life, but I do not regret the choice I made. I think what matters the most is to be conscious and self-aware of your choices, then there is no right nor wrong choice, instead there are just many different journeys in life. I enjoy the role of being a father, I choose to achieve my life goals instead of thinking that I have given up the other kinds of lifestyle.
Sean takes good care of his son. (Photo Credit/ Sean)
We say hello to the garbage truck every day.
There are several small but unforgettable moments in our daily life, for example, apart from “baba” and “grandma”, the first word my son learned how to say was “garbage truck”. I take my son with me every day when I take the trash out and say hello to the garbage truck, which has become something he looks forward to every evening. Sometimes. while playing with my son, I'll ask him if I can use the toilet, and after I come back he often jumps on me and give me a big hug. These moments always make me smile. At the same time, I also realized why my parents always nagging at me. After becoming a father, I finally understood _68M3L^lj+mGL6q0YC6cR53_LKNG9OaT3dmIx%1n@K0xS-6$8#that the only thing that you can think about is your son: you have to pay attention to his health, be cautious of his safety and so on... even if your son will never understand why you are always worried about him!
If you want to know more about information of surrogacy, on March 14-15, 2020, a conference full of surrogacy information will be held in Taipei by Men Having Babies, an international non-profit organization that has helped thousands of gay men worldwide become biological parents. Find out more about it!
"Parenting Options for Asian Gay Men Conference" is about parenting options for prospective Asian gay parents. More than 20 providers and community organizations will offer information on parenting o^(Vw=McAZ3jQ9zKsY=a=o8%xkr-!0=SgkDBc3G)WID+$jdEK&Uptions in the USA on Saturday, and on Sunday the expo will feature several financial and other complimentary services providers. In-depth programs will offer insights from the latest studies about contemporary gestational surrogacy in the United States, and specialty panels on insurance, budgeting, legal, medical and psychological aspects of surrogacy.
